No Expextations

When things come least expected and it's good.. you are overwhelmed by the great luck you received. But when something happened unexpected and you got hurt, you build a fortress to help you not to touch those hot waters again...

In the situation I am now, I wanted to build a wall but I know I should take the latter, and that is to not to expect...these are the times when "no" is associated to a word and it becomes a good thing.. " NO EXPECTATIONS"....However, these words does not come in small packages, you need great deal of attitude and character to conquer it...As they say attitude is 10% of what is happening to you but it's 90% of how you choose to react....I got tired of being historical and hysterical as my pastor say...She said, when we are angry, we become hysterical..shouting, cursing, adding ridicule to insult..I also become historical, digging the ghost of past and let them haunt me until I get to a point of exploding....

If there are no expectations, you are conquering your fears, and most of all you are to the best of your character, meaning being true to yourself to forgive...Forgive the person who hurt you, and most of all to forgive yourself for letting it take over you...I am no saint, but I know I am still of clear mind...because I can forgive...NO EXPECTATIONS anymore....

OUCH!!!

"I have learned now that while those who speak about ones miseries usually hurt, but those who keep silence hurt more. " — C.S. Lewis

It hurts I admit, until now, it does. But the situation can hurt you as long as you allow it to. I thought to myself, life has to move on...your life is moving on, what should be the reason why mine can't?

Scanning to those photos, made my head hurt, because of all the questions that keep on popping in my mind. At first I acted of hiding, keeping away...but then again I thought, why would I hide..I was no the liar...

The truth is that I loved you...I hurt inside because I trusted you..I was true to those feelings during the time we were together...even the little hope I have now, diminished..

To be honest, I am happy for you, you have your plans coming together, your brother is here.. you have a good job, that provides for your family.. you made your mom proud....but you are the worst father of them all...how can you live each day??? how can you even breath....??

One day, time will fly away and I'll be just laughing about these things....and that time starts now......